i am

i am

i am a crazy chameleon

wishing i could find a way to

confine myself to one color

wishing i wasn’t lost every time i found you

i am a disconnected telephone

voices inside of me screaming

with no one listening

to the nonsense and the dreaming

i am an abandoned house

crumbling from the inside out

crying for the people who never stay

missing smiles i fear and love that i doubt

i am the one never chosen

i am desperate despondent and lonesome

and maybe i should not admit it

but my light is fading and my heart lies broken

i am crushing myself

under the weight of a lost spring

i am losing myself

in the rainstorms my summers always bring